One breath at a time

Well, life is smoothing out. The last year has been full of so many changes that I could not find my center. The journaling has helped. I realize that I've been searching for a center that doesn't exist anymore, so I'm seeking a new center.... and it seems to be constantly shifting, like a top. The "Where am I at?" exercise in The Creative Journal has been particularly helpful in uncovering where my balance exists from day to day.

My relationship with Jason is... well, I'm relaxing into it finally. It's been a struggle to accept the fact that such a wonderful and accepting man really loves me. I realize that whatever ideas I've had about what a relationship is supposed to feel like are not necessarily true. I've heard that relationships are hard. Now I understand what that means. For me, it's about being present and available in it... and not believing everything I think. THOUGHTS ARE NOT FACTS. There are alot of old beliefs that I am having to release in order to be present and available. I've had these beliefs for so long that they have become my security... it's alot of crap to wade through. I just need to remember, from moment to moment, where my security really lies.